The Ivey Files

Ah the agony. Waiting for the decision from the admissions office. It makes everyone edgy - not just you, but also your parents. A lot of applicants I know find managing their parents' anxiety more difficult than managing their own anxiety. So we'll start there. How do you manage your parents' anxiety?

Well, first you accept that you can't manage anyone else's feelings. Can't be done. If your parents are anxious, they are anxious. That's that.

So why a blog about how to manage your parents' anxiety? Because you can do three things that will help you with your parents (and actually help them, since they are mostly anxious because they are worried about you!).

1. Remind yourself that you are not responsible for your parents' feelings. They are. It is part of growing up that you start to understand this distinction. Even if your parents' feelings are about you, you are not responsible. This distinction is a bit tricky, but it's real. So release any anxiety you have because you are making your parents anxious. You aren't anxiety-inducing. Life is.
   
2. Even though you can't do anything about their feelings, you can do something about their behavior in response to those feelings. You can help your parents direct their behavior in ways that support you instead of compound your own anxiety and edginess. In a calm moment, tell them that you really appreciate that they are so concerned about your happiness and well-being AND that the best way for them to show their support of you is to [fill in the blank]. Here are some ideas for filling in the blank: not talk about college admissions at all, but instead talk about all the other things going on in life; instead of looking at you with the "concerned eyes," give you a hug and tell you how much they love you. You get the idea. BE SPECIFIC. And it doesn't hurt to praise them when they do what you've asked. That alone will startle them so much that they will probably leave you alone for a good 24 hours.
   
3. Manage your own feelings and behavior in response to them. You're anxious. You're edgy. That's okay. It is to be expected. But how do you act when you are anxious and edgy? If you snap at everyone, or let loose with some winning sarcasm, or fail to exhibit common courtesies, that's not okay. Worse still is if you medicate those feelings with alcohol, smoking, or drugs. That's not just not okay - that's a death spiral. It's time to grow up and respond constructively to these feelings. Do things that calm you down - work out, listen to music, have some fun with friends.

And the decision is coming. It won't be much longer that you have to be a mature grown-up while feeling like you are about to jump out of your skin. I promise.

Comments or Questions?

Want to vent your anxiety or ask for guidance on how to talk to your parents?  Post your issue, no matter how big or small. We'll respond!

Alison Cooper Chisolm writes the series 52 Weeks to College. She has worked in admissions at Southern Methodist University, the University of Chicago, and most recently Dartmouth College. She is a graduate of Yale College and the University of Virginia Law School. As part of the Ivey Consulting team, Alison works with college applicants and their families as they navigate the college admissions process. Read more about Alison here. 

Two great new postings from Steve Schwartz at LSAT Blog, one on the shift in test dates this coming season (and why that matters), and the June vs. October debate. Well worth reading.

• LSAT Test Dates in 2010 and 2011 | Change From Previous Years

• Deciding to Take June vs October LSAT | Pros and Cons

 

Is there a type of essay that annoys admissions officers so much that they'll stop in the middle of reading an application to vent? Yep. Here's what just hit my inbox:

I doubt you'd let your clients do this anyway, but the most annoying kind of essay I see is the "Why I'm so perfect/how I've ticked all the boxes. Can I recite my resume for you?" essay. 

It takes the form of: "Since early childhood, I have been an over-achieving perfectionist. Not content simply to excel at everything I have done, like be the president of the school paper and work for my state senator while maintaining a 4.0 GPA, I wanted to share my wonderfulness with the less fortunate. So I also have an extensive background in public service. I recognize that there are certain skills that one needs to excel as a lawyer, so I have acquired those, as well, by doing A, B, and C. Now I am primed to enter law school.  Admission to [---] Law School will be the culmination of my decade of effort - nay, the laurel wreath crowning my wonderfulness."

By the way, that final sentence is only a slight adaptation of the one I actually just read.

We on the admissions committee will take the B+ student with 85% percentile LSATs and an essay demonstrating personal maturity and an interesting set of life experiences over the A student with 90% LSATs and an essay like the one above every time.

For those of you who haven't submitted your applications yet, or who are applying in the coming season, take heed. Anyone with law school admissions experience will have an allergic reaction to that kind of essay, and there are tens of thousands of them floating around every year. Treat that as a template for what NOT to write.

 

Are law schools and business schools, as well as applicants, obsessed with interdisciplinary education? In my experience, yes, and I have cautioned against what Judge Easterbrook called "Cyberspace and the Law of the Horse" ("put together two fields about which you know very little and get the worst of both words"). Getting interdisciplinary education right is hard.

Now Jeff Lipshaw, a professor at Suffolk Law School and all-around smart guy, has published a paper arguing that interdisciplinarity isn't enough anyway, because someone has to make the judgment call about what goes into that intersection, and how to solve those complexities:

The relationship of pure and mixed business and legal judgment can be modeled in a Venn diagram. The question is who is capable of making judgments in the overlap. Businesspeople are not competent to assess the legal implications, and not inclined merely to trust the decision to lawyers. Lawyers, on the other hand, are usually successors to a particular method of organizing the world, and members of a closed discipline. By nature of the very concept of a judgment, it must occur privately in a single conscious mind, no matter how the judgment is ultimately communicated, shared, or adopted by others. The implication for lawyering and legal education is that some of the old canards about leaving business judgment to the business people must fall away....

Business judgment depends far more on the argument from merit, versus legal judgment, which depends far more on the argument from authority, and a particular kind of authority at that. What, then, does it means to be an expert in the overlap of the diagram? We need to define a new professional discipline: the field of metadisciplinarity. Being a metadisciplinarian takes one to a higher order skill than mere interdisciplinarity: it means being an expert in the making of interdisciplinary judgments.... 

Read more here.

For more casual readers, I asked Jeff how this all boils down, and here's what he said:

There's a skill in deciding things you don't know much about.  Unfortunately, it's not a skill taught much in law school, nor anywhere in academia where strong disciplines govern.

Your point is correct - getting the second degree doesn't help much.  You also have to jump across the divide to make good business/legal judgments, whether you have the second degree or not, just as doubling down in academic disciplines doesn't do much except co-opt you in both orthodoxies!

Those of you who work or teach in one or the other discipline, or at the intersection of both, we'd love to hear your thoughts. Please share.

It has finally come. The lull. You have nothing, I repeat, nothing to do this week that relates to college admission. Well, actually I am going to suggest one thing. I encourage you to learn the life skill of "enjoying the lull."

Some people can't do it. You know who they are - the types that always have to be busy, busy, busy; the types that can't stand to turn off their cell phones; the types that barely finish one project before another one is underway. In my experience, these types either die young (no lie, drop dead of a heart attack at the desk in the office) or aren't really very happy or both.

If you are going to master enjoying the lull, you should do the following things this week (skill building for enjoying the lull):

1. Do one thing at a time. No multi-tasking. Whatever you are doing, do it only. So if you are playing Wii, do it and nothing else.
2. Play. Make time every day to do whatever you do that you do just because it is fun. No redeeming qualities, no resume building potential, no "shoulds." If you are really playing, you'll know it because you'll laugh out loud at some point for no reason.
3. Take a nap or go to bed early. Bonus sleep. It always serves you well.

That's it. Life is good all the time, but the lull is especially good!

Comments or Questions?

Post a suggestion for fun things to do during the lull.  We all like new ideas for play!

Alison Cooper Chisolm writes the series 52 Weeks to College. She has worked in admissions at Southern Methodist University, the University of Chicago, and most recently Dartmouth College. She is a graduate of Yale College and the University of Virginia Law School. As part of the Ivey Consulting team, Alison works with college applicants and their families as they navigate the college admissions process. Read more about Alison here.

 

I'm excited to be speaking at NYU's pre-law event this coming Monday. For all you NYUers out there who are thinking of participating: please post your questions here (or shoot me an email at blog at annaivey dot com) and I'll do my best to work them in. Looking forward to meeting you all!

Some of you probably waited until the last minute to complete your CSS Financial Aid Profile on the College Board's site.  If you did, you may have found yourself caught in severe slowdowns and intermittent outages on Sunday, January 31st.  According to the College Board, the problems started at about 5.30p EST and were not resolved until midnight (in other words, right at the February 1st deadline).

If you were one of those students affected, you need to confirm with each college that your PROFILE application was processed and submitted by the deadline.  If the college received it late, explain your problem and ask that the deadline be waived.  The College Board has notified schools that there were problems, so you may find mercy.  If the college did not receive it, resubmit it along with any documentation showing that you thought it had been submitted by the deadline.

I live in the Northeast. As I write this blog, it is sunny, but freezing cold outside --- somewhere in the neighborhood of 10-15 below with the wind chill. That's probably why I scheduled this week into the 52 week plan now - I want to look ahead to summer and remind myself that it will be warm again! Regardless of where you live, it would be a good idea for you to look ahead to your summer now. Why? Because thinking about it now gives you time to make the necessary supporting plans and then execute those plans. It ensures that you can have the summer you want to have.

So grab a few sheets of paper and prepare yourself to dream a little about the perfect summer after high school graduation. Answer these 10 questions and you'll have the outline of a plan for your summer and some obvious next steps for turning the dream into a reality.

1. When will your summer officially begin? Generally it is after graduation, but it may be different for you.
2. When will your summer officially end? Generally it is the day you arrive at college. Since we're dreaming now, pull out the calendar for your top pick school and see when you have to be on campus.
3. Do you want or need to work to earn money for college? Where might you work? When do you need to apply? What would your ideal schedule be?
4. Do you want to complete an internship or service project to build your skills and deepen your sense of possible career paths? What opportunities are available to you? When are the application deadlines?
5. What do you want to do for fun? Where, when, and with whom?
6. Do you want to plan some special times with your family or close friends to celebrate your graduation or to say goodbye as you leave for college?
7. When are you going to have some "down time" to just be and recover from the crazy, hectic time of senior year before starting on the new adventure called college?
8. Do you need to do some reading or complete a class before you arrive at college in the fall?
9. Does the college have a required Freshman Orientation? If so, when? Are there any optional add-on Freshman Experiences that you'd like to consider? What are they?
10. How are you going to get to college? How much time will it take?

That's it. Summer planning is almost as easy and as much fun as summer itself. Now schedule the things you need to do over the next two months for sure (e.g. apply for jobs, internships, or service projects or plan graduation celebration) and leave the rest until May 1. At that point, you can finalize the plan because you'll know where you are going to college.

As for me, I'm going to check out the recommendations on kayaks and plan a quiet water kayaking vacation for me and my husband. And of course, I'll include some stops at colleges that I've never visited so I have more information for my next class of applicants!

Comments or Questions?

Share your summer plans with us, particularly if they include some beach time!  Let others know about opportunities that are great for the last summer before college! 

Alison Cooper Chisolm writes the series 52 Weeks to College. She has worked in admissions at Southern Methodist University, the University of Chicago, and most recently Dartmouth College. She is a graduate of Yale College and the University of Virginia Law School. As part of the Ivey Consulting team, Alison works with college applicants and their families as they navigate the college admissions process. Read more about Alison here.

Guess what? February is Financial Aid Awareness Month! It's true. And for all of you who are planning to start college in the fall, it is definitely the time to think about financial aid. Here are a few things that you should be aware of and do something about this week if you are staying on track with the 52 Weeks to College plan. (A previous posting also talked about Financial Aid so start with that if you haven't been following along week by week.)

1. Get your FAFSA and CSS Profile completed and submitted. You can do both of them online, but deadlines are looming for most college financial aid processes, so don't delay! By the way, if your parents are resisting filling out the FAFSA because they did it for older siblings and it was a big pain and they didn't get the financial aid they wanted, let them know that the FAFSA has gotten much easier and that older siblings in school reduces the estimated family contribution.
2. Research (if you haven't already) scholarships for which you may be eligible. The College Board has a good basic outline for how to go about doing that. Please heed their warning regarding scholarship finder scams. They are real and every year some families get taken in by them and I hate that.
3. Educate yourself about what's going on in terms of changes in the law that will benefit you and your family - for example, new legislation will increase the amount of Pell Grants in the coming years. A good summary (and quick read) has been put together by U.S. News.

Comments or Questions?

Celebrate completing your financial aid applications with a "Wahoo!" posting or get encouragement if you are having trouble getting it done with a "Need Cheerleading" posting!

Alison Cooper Chisolm writes the series 52 Weeks to College. She has worked in admissions at Southern Methodist University, the University of Chicago, and most recently Dartmouth College. She is a graduate of Yale College and the University of Virginia Law School. As part of the Ivey Consulting team, Alison works with college applicants and their families as they navigate the college admissions process. Read more about Alison here.

You should have your grades from your first term of senior year by now. And by the end of next week, the colleges to which you have applied should too. They get them in the form of the Midyear Report if they are a Common Application school or something similar if they use their own forms.

So whether the Midyear Report is good, bad, or ugly, here is what you need to do to keep your applications on track:

1.  If you don't have grades yet, get them! (Some of you may not have them because you ended up with incompletes - resolve that now! Some of you may not have them because your teachers haven't turned them in - pester them to do it!) Your Midyear Report is important and colleges need to get it in a timely manner.

2.  Confirm that your counselor has sent in the Midyear Report. If he/she hasn't, follow up and make sure he/she does by February 15.

3.  Deal with what it contains and how it changes your academic profile.

• If it is good news -- it raises your GPA or class standing or demonstrates a positive recovery or grade trend -- MAKE SURE THAT IS OBVIOUS. That means that your GPA is updated on your transcript, that your class standing is updated on your transcript or on the counselor's report, or that your counselor makes some note of it in the Evaluation section. YOU are responsible for making sure this good news gets shared, so meet with your counselor and let him/her know what you want highlighted. If he/she isn't receptive, then formulate a short e-mail to the admissions office and toot your own horn in two-three sentences that recount the facts clearly. E.g. "I hope that the admissions office has received and processed my Midyear Report. I am excited and proud to note that I moved into the top 10% of my class because of my performance in the fall term of my senior year. Thank you."
• If it is bad news - a decline in GPA, class standing, part of a trend of declining grades, or a particularly bad/anomalous grade in one class -- then you need to do some damage control. There are a couple of possible ways to do this. One is to meet with your counselor and discuss the situation and see if the counselor can address it in his/her evaluation in a positive way, e.g. "Johnny struggled in Chemistry for Geniuses, but it is our hardest science course and no one in the class got an A, so even though it appears that his performance has declined, it really is a demonstration of his commitment to challenging himself and a success." Another is to become your own advocate, but you must do so without slipping into an excuse-making, whiny tone. Generally speaking, you are striving to explain, without trying to excuse, and you are taking full responsibility for the grades you got. E.g. "I am writing to add some additional information regarding my Midyear Report. I am disappointed that my overall GPA slipped during this term. Despite my efforts to stay on top of my school work, I was out of school quite a bit because of my participation on the Varsity Soccer Team. It took its toll, but I expect my grades to rebound in the spring, because I won't be playing sports. You can see that a similar dip happened in the fall of my junior year and I made it up in the spring." BE SURE AND INCLUDE YOUR FULL NAME AND SOCIAL SECURITY NUMBER on all correspondence, so it gets to the right file. You don't want another Leslie or David to benefit from your damage control.

4. Be sure to make your own midyear report if you have something else to share that boosts your profile. An honor bestowed or a significant achievement earned should be communicated to the admissions office and added to your file. So if you just were elected into Honor Society, share that news. Likewise, if you qualified for the Junior Olympics, let them know. The easiest way to share this news is an email. Again, it does not need to be long. Two to three sentences is plenty, but again BE SURE TO INCLUDE YOUR FULL NAME AND SOCIAL SECURITY NUMBER, so it gets to the right file. An email from Beth at bemerry@aol.com runs the risk of not making into the file of one Elizabeth Morgan, because no one knows that Elizabeth Morgan is the Beth who was crowned Homecoming Queen at Big Public School in Maryland and the admissions staff don't have time to chase down the email address.

That's all for this week. Take care of this business and then get back to enjoying your last months in high school!

Comments or Questions?

Not sure whether you are explaining or whining?  Post a draft and we'll let you know! 

Alison Cooper Chisolm writes the series 52 Weeks to College. She has worked in admissions at Southern Methodist University, the University of Chicago, and most recently Dartmouth College. She is a graduate of Yale College and the University of Virginia Law School. As part of the Ivey Consulting team, Alison works with college applicants and their families as they navigate the college admissions process. Read more about Alison here.